Expiration Date
I set the milk down on the counter. My oldest took a sip and ate his breakfast. The middle kid took a sip and about died. The milk was bad. I checked the expiration date and it was still good. I smelled it (Why do …
Tag: faith
My Best Life
“The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy; I came that they may have life, and have it abundantly.” John 10:10 I follow a lifestyle blogger who touts living her best life. She just turned forty and decided that it is about time …
It’s Complicated
The complexities of faith. We google and search trying to find answers to our faith. We look up the Hebrew and Greek translations studying the context of the time trying to make sense of it all. We listen to the voices from the pulpit and the ones who are deemed authorities on all things Scripture related and write their words in permanent ink on our hearts. Others walk away from faith completely. It’s too hard to understand, makes absolutely no sense, or, we’ve deemed it all crazy. Whatever the case may be for you, we sure have made this whole faith thing complex.
“What made sense to me when I first heard about Jesus is how He doesn’t give us a bunch of directions intended to manipulate our behavior or control our conduct. Instead, He has beautiful hopes for us and has told us what those are, but He isn’t scowling at us when we’re not yet ready to have those same hopes for ourselves. He won’t love us more or less based on how we act, and He’s not stuck telling us what to do, when to do it, or what we want either. Far better, He continues to tell us through our successes and our mistakes who we are, and here’s what He wants us to know-we are His.” Bob Goff
I got a text from a friend the other day. It was the anniversary of a loved one’s death. She was trying to reconcile this person’s faith. He said he believed in God but his faith really stopped there. She was asking us to help her make peace with whether or not he was in Heaven. Since I am not in Heaven myself and cannot give her absolute certainty, here is what I told her. It’s a matter of his heart. We are going to more surprised by who is not in Heaven than who makes it there. The outward actions of our faith carry far less weight than the truths of our hearts.
We get so concerned with and wrapped up in our actions; what people can see that we lose sight of Jesus. The rules matter more than the relationship. Being right according to our faith carries more authority than loving our neighborhood. We exhaust ourselves from trying to do it right all the time when Jesus is asking us to let Him carry the weight of our burdens. Our hearts are what matter; are what’s on the line. Yet, instead of exercising our hearts, we are facilitating our rightness.
Jesus isn’t complicated and that scares us. He doesn’t keep a record of wrongs. He doesn’t roll out His list of rules we must follow. He loves. That’s it. And it’s that love that propels others to change.
Reckless love like that of Jesus scares the heck out of us. When people choose to follow Jesus this way, their faith is questioned.
How can you just love? It’s our job to keep people on the right track.
No, no it isn’t.
How can you love that person? Your job is to hold them accountable.
No, no it isn’t.
How can you love that person? Their lifestyle completely opposes the church.
I can love because of Jesus. We forget that Jesus was there when we were created; when life first began. He knows our ins, outs, and in-betweens. He knows we need time to come to terms with what He sees in us. I know this because I can look at every single person in the Bible and see how each of them needed time to fully accept and step into the person God was calling them to be.
God called Moses to leadership but Moses told God he wasn’t a leader.
God called Sarah into motherhood and she told God she was too old.
God called David to be king but he was the scrawny kid.
God called Mary to be the mother of the Savior yet she was a unwed teen.
God called Peter to be the rock on which the church would be built but he would betray Jesus.
God called Saul to bring the saving message of the Gospels to the Gentiles, yet he killed Christians.
I can go on and on listing others who were not what God called them to be. They could not see this person in themselves. Yet, there was something in Jesus, that extravagant love, that led them to those callings. That same love resides in you and me and those people you shun.
We like rules. We like structure. It makes us feel safe. It gives us a script when everything is so unknown. It makes us feel like we are in control. What I am finding, however, is that the rules are like chains on my soul. They are too complex and I end up living in fear instead of freedom. Fear that I will fail at the next turn because there is absolutely no way I can live out all these regulations. I was never meant to live this way that’s why it feels like a prison.
Jesus’ love scared the Pharisees of His time and it scares us today. Because there are no limits to His love, we steer away from it and head towards our rules. They feel safer than His limitless love.
God’s love is reckless and risky and so very freeing. It allows space for mess-ups and mistakes. His love gives rise to what we are to become and in that becoming, He desires for us to know Him in the deepest parts of our souls. God’s love is simple in a world that is so complex. You no longer behave because you are terrified of breaking one of the rules. You start to live righteously because of Love. You make good and pure choices because of Love. You serve others out of Love not obligation. You are free because of Love.
Love isn’t a bunch of rules. Love is Jesus wholly and purely present in your life. Go break the rules today and love.
“Let me give you a new command: Love one another. In the same way I loved you, you love one another. This is how everyone will recognize that you are my disciples—when they see the love you have for each other.” John 13:35
Love & Blessings,
Meg
The Messy Mingling
I had a dream. I was at a conference and a speaker did not show. I was asked last minute to fill in. I did not have any content; nothing written down. I had gone as an attendee desperately wanting to fly under the radar …
The Circle
I have a circle.
You do, too. Inside of our circles are all the rules; a certain way to live. We like things a certain way. We also like to force others to live inside our circles. We desire them to abide to our rules, opinions, and ways. If they do not conform to our circle, we become frustrated and angry.
My husband and I got into a fight. Well, not really a fight but a disagreement. Over what, you ask? Oh, you know, a pan. Like a pan you cook with. I will spare you the (lame) details, but let’s just say this “disagreement” was my fault. I wanted something a certain way and he did not heed my desire. When we hashed it all out, I realized I wanted him to live inside my circle. And you know what? He doesn’t reside there. I do. And while he does have the right to tell me how I can and cannot treat him, he doesn’t have the authority to tell me how I should feel in a certain situation (and vice versa).
This is the same when it comes to our faith journeys. Each of our journey looks different yet we desperately want them all to look the same. We may say we don’t, but our actions speak differently. When someone doesn’t live in our faith circle, we will do anything and everything to make the jump.
We want all our circles to be perfectly round and the same size; cookie cutter. There is no room for ovals or circles that are off-center. No one’s circle needs to be bigger than the next guys and our circles aren’t supposed to be small. Just like the houses of the suburbs, every circle should look the same.
Let me challenge us (especially us, Christians) to stop forcing each other to fit in our circles. While we do have the authority to tell people about Jesus, we do not have the authority to tell people how to get there. That’s their circle. Not ours.
My husband and I like to take different routes home from church. I like to avoid this one highway (it’s a mess) and he likes the speed he can travel on said highway. We take our separate paths but both make it home. One may take longer than the other, but we both make it. Neither way is wrong. Just different. The destination, Jesus, is the same for each of us. The way we get to that end is our own circle.
I found freedom when I released others from living inside my circle. I understand that they, too, have a circle where they reside. My circle is for me and me alone. It only works for me and no one else. Jesus talks to me in a particular way in my circle that is unique to me. He speaks to you in your circle in only a way you can hear Him.
I like the space inside my circle. A lot. But, my circle isn’t for everyone else. Just me.
Don’t force others to live in your circle. It wasn’t meant for them. Respect the boundaries of their circles, too. You’ll find freedom there. And, who knows, maybe Jesus will be seen more vibrantly when we all stick to our own circles.
Love & Blessings,
Meg
The Exchange
Today, this Good Friday, your social media feeds will be filled with pictures of Christ on the cross and quotes about His death. people will lament about what happened on this fateful day. Most of us will scroll past because we are numb to it …
Flashback Friday: Ministry in the Mommyhood
Anyone struggle in the parenting realm? I wish I had the hand-raising emoji. I have a feeling we would all be raising our hands. Like any mom, I struggle in all the things motherhood. Just name a day of the week and I can tell you a struggle. We all struggle as moms. Even if we have our mom-game down, we still have our moments.
I could write a ten-page blog about all my struggles. But, for the sake of time, I will only chat about one. When I got pregnant with my first-born, I was getting my Masters degree. I thought I would work forever. I had always worked and liked the feeling of contributing to society and financially to our home. I remember talking to a friend when I was about seven months pregnant. He told me I was going to want to quit after I had the baby. In that moment, I knew for certain he was wrong. And then, my baby was born.
I had quite a bit of time off with the way my schedule landed, so I didn’t go back to work until he was five months old. I was dreading it (as any mom does), but thought I would adapt just fine. Wrong. I was a hot mess. I hit two parked cars on two separate days in all my emotional frenzy. I would cry almost every day. It was horrible. My husband finally told me that we couldn’t do this anymore and that something needed to change. So, I quit my job and we moved to Texas.
I remember the relief I felt when I knew the only focus I had was my son. I felt like a million pounds had been lifted. I had no idea what I was in for with the new title of “Stay-at-home” mom. I had wonderful people around me giving me really good advice but I needed to live it.
Everything was going good in my new role, not without struggles, but good with one exception: feeling valuable.
In case you didn’t know, motherhood doesn’t pay. Well, not in the traditional form of a paycheck. I knew and valued success partly by my paycheck and partly through how my students responded to my teaching. Every time I finished some credits for my Masters, I ticked up on the pay scale. That felt good. When my kindergartners left at the end of the year reading when they came to me not speaking a lick of English, I felt accomplished. When my sixth graders started believing in themselves when no one else did because of what we were doing in class, I felt a tinge of pride.
Now, I found myself at home with a kiddo who couldn’t tell me I was doing a good job and didn’t have the means to pay me. My husband would leave everyday to his job where he was praised for his wins and successes. He paid all the bills and I spent all the money. His money.
What I didn’t realize in those early years, and still struggle with today, is that motherhood IS a ministry. Just like any other job title, motherhood IS valuable. Without mothers, our world would collapse. I believe this with all my heart.
We are told all the time that motherhood is the hardest job on the planet. We are told that without us mamas, all would be lost. And I completely agree. But, it is hard to live feeling valued when your toddler is mad at you because you gave him lunch on the wrong plate. Or, you cannot, for the life of you, keep up with all the laundry. The toys are strewn all over the playroom spilling into the hallway. Shoes are on the stairs. There are clothes in heaps in strange places as if your kid evaporated. You feel ragged, worn-out, worn-down, and useless. Let me free you from the anxiety of trying to keep it all together: our value doesn’t lie in this space.
Motherhood is an explainable conundrum. You do a million and one things during the day to serve these petite humans with no thank you, no paycheck, no good job, or gold star. Most days, you seem to go unnoticed. Yet, that does not decrease your value.
Our value does not lie in a paycheck. It doesn’t come in a compliment. We don’t lose our value when we don’t get all the chores done or the house is a disaster. Our ministry in the mommyhood is powered by sweet little hands around our necks giving us a hug. Our value is felt in sloppy baby kisses and goodnight stares while rocking them to sleep. It comes when your kindergarten brings home their first writing and it is about their mommy. Ministry in the mommyhood is felt when your middle schooler still wants you to walk him out to the bus and wants you to hear about their day and your grown child calls for advice. This is our payment.
We place value on things that don’t matter like mommyhood does. We forget to see that the daily trenches of motherhood are our ministry and we aren’t paid because no amount of money could come close to paying us our worth.
I am standing beside you on these mommyhood front lines telling you, telling me, that we are valuable. Our ministry: the laundry, the cleaning, the cleaning again, and again, the homework battles, the diaper changes, the cooking and feeding and cooking and feeding, the boo boo kissing, the tear wiping, the Lego and Barbie playing ALL MATTERS. EVERY. SINGLE. BIT.
The ministry of the mommyhood is one of the most treasured and valuable things on earth. Don’t ever question your worth for you are far more precious than diamonds.
Love & Blessings,
Meg
Flashback Friday: Nothing to Prove
“How sweet is your name, Lord, how good You are Love to sing in the name of the Lord, love to sing for you all? Death could not hold You, the veil tore before You You silenced the boast, of sin and grave The heavens …