No Demo Reno
Before It’s amazing what a little paint and changing light fixtures and mirrors can do. I am here to give you a little bit of hope letting you know that you don’t have to spend a fortune to renovate. We all know the cost of …
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Out of Whack
About balance… I am a big Peloton rider. I got my bike about four years ago and have been hooked every since. It’s just easy and the community is what I need right now. Every time you get on a workout, the instructor says something …
Bring Me Back to JOY
The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy. I came that they may have life and have it abundantly. John 10:10, KJV: The thief cometh not, but for to steal, and to kill, and to destroy: I am come that they might have life, and that they might have it more abundantly.
John 10:10
I know this verse. I have heard it spoken and preached numerous times over the years. I always felt like I had a good handle on it and lived a life in (spiritual) abundance. It wasn’t until this past year, the past two years really, I realized that I wasn’t living all that abundantly. I allowed the standards and expectations of life, culture, and that I had placed on myself kill and destroy my joy. I was trying to stuff myself in the box. I didn’t create the walls of this box. They were built by others’ expectations and beliefs about success. I stuffed myself in the box because it felt safe. Living for someone else’s thoughts on what success looked like meant I didn’t have to put myself out there. All my hopes and dreams would never (potentially) fail because I was sitting in someone else’s box.
We commit to a dream, a stirring in our hearts, to move and do the thing we feel God is asking us to do. We know it to be true because most of the time when we create, we find joy. The process energizes us. From the moment the first idea pops in our head to completion, we experience joy. However, somewhere along the way the joy we started with starts to deteriorate. Just a little at a time. So sneaky. Enough not to notice until we find ourselves in a rhythm or forced hustle and the joy is gone.
It is time to get back to what sets our souls on fire. We need to find that thing, the process, the creation, the writing, whatever it is and let that have the lead part in this portion of our lives once again. This may take stripping down and letting go of some things we’ve picked up along the way. This can be scary. Many of those things we’ve picked up are the things that are supposed to help us become successful at our craft. Tools, advice, processes we’ve learned along the way that are meant to propel us forward in our craft. What we didn’t realize, though, was that every time we picked up a new tool or process, we had to set down some of our joy.
When we lose our joy in our craft, we lose a little bit of ourselves and thus, lose our audience. Working from a place of joy instead of hustle is contagious. Joy energizes our souls and gets us excited to complete the work before us.
Ask yourself:
Am I living abundantly in spirit while doing my craft?
What can I let go of so I can let some joy back in?
How have I overcomplicated the process?
What areas look like forced hustle and less joy? Or, what are some ways you know you will gravitate towards that will pull your joy away?
When God placed this passion project on your heart, he wanted you to do it because he knew it would bring you joy. He knows the complexities of your heart and inner workings. He knows what sets your soul on fire. That’s why he gave you this dream. He does not desire for your dream to lose its joy. So, how can you get back to joy today?
A Little Bit of Hope
Life likes to get in the way of our hopes and dreams. It swoops in and derails us pulling us away from what breaths life into our souls and into stress and chaos. What if continuing to live out your dreams, those things that sit …
The First Renovation
The first renovation took me by surprise. I didn’t expect an overflowed toilet to lead to a gut job. Thirty minutes of flowing water causes quite a bit of damage.
About five years ago, my oldest and I went to a meeting for a camo he was going to attend that summer. The younger two boys were home with my husband. Scott went out to the garage to do q quick workout leaving the boys in the house. One of the boys, who shall remain nameless, went to the bathroom in his older brother’s room, flushed the toilet (thankfully, but not), and left the room not knowing what was about to transpire.
This bathroom is upstairs and in the center of the house. The water flowed for what we think was thirty minutes before my husband came in to water gushing down the walls and through the ceiling on the lower level. The two boys were playing in their playroom which was situated just so in a corner of the house where they would be none the wiser to what was going on. My oldest and I get home to chaos. The hubs yelling for more towels and the shop vac. Me not knowing quite yet what was going on but grabbing things anyway.
Needless to say, that water created quite a bit of damage. Walls torn down, wood floors pulled up, carpet gone, and fans and dehumidifiers going for month would send anyone into a spiral. Me, however, it awakened something in me that had been dormant far too long.
That season of frustration, chaos, and, I’m not gonna lie, some tears introduced me to something I didn’t realize I was missing. I loved home renovation and design. I always have. I look back on my childhood and see so many instances of rearranging my room, painting, and begging my mom to let me hang things on the walls. It was no different when I moved out. I can still remember the bedding I chose in the two apartments I lived in when I was in college. I remember our couch and coffee table and all the throw pillows that drove Scott mad in our first apartment as a married couple. I loved when we moved and I got to redesign a brand new space oftentimes turning an old home into our new space.
I type all this out because I know there are many out there who have something inside them dormant waiting to get out. A piece of yourself you stuffed down deep not thinking you are good enough to share it with the world. You’ve convinced yourself that you need more experience, a degree, or some type of outside validation before you step into your truest self doing what you were meant to do. I am here to tell you to just do it.
Love you.
Mean it.
Meg
Who Am I
We don’t have to pick up all our broken pieces in order to put ourselves back together. We can leave some on the floor.
Re-Invent Yourself
For the past ten years, I have tried to fit my square peg into a round hole. I was a teacher before I chose to stay home almost 15 years ago. I became a teacher because I liked kids and knew it was something I …
Finding Myself
It has taken me years to finally give up on the search to find the one career path that suits me. Not because I’ve actually found it, but because I finally realized I never will.
themessymingling.com
I don’t have memories growing up dreaming about what I would be one day. I grew up in Southern California, so I guess I had the dream to be famous. But, it wasn’t an actual goal. I went into teaching as my major in college because I knew it was something I could do and that I was good with kids. It was never a dream, though. I really wanted to be a psychologist, but couldn’t afford all the schooling. Becoming a teacher was more of a way to support myself. That is why, when we had our son, it was easy to step away and stay home.
Choosing to stay home wasn’t easy in the literal sense, though. Not because I it was my dream job. Don’t get me wrong, I loved my team and the kids I taught. Leaving, however, was tough because I am a doer and go-getter, not because I was walking away from a dream. Leaving felt like I lost a piece of myself instead of walking away from a dream job.
I have ebbed and flowed throughout the years since choosing to stay home with my boys. I have dappled in photography, teaching preschool, leading Bible studies, blogging, writing, podcasting, home design, gardening, and hobby farming. I went after some for monetary value trying to find a way to make a little extra cash while doing something that brought me joy. The other things I did because they filled my cup. Either way, you can look at that list and think, “This girl is all over the place!” And you’d be right.
Either way, you can look at that list and think, “This girl is all over the place!” And you’d be right.
themessymingling.com
My skills and interests will never be limited to the scope of just one job; just one thing. I will never be content with the knowledge of just one trade. I love that I love so many things. I found freedom in being and becoming who I am in any given season. I thrive on learning new things, new ways of doing things, or new ways of thinking. I love finding new passions and sharing them with others. What a gift!
I think the way we live in our world today is doing us a disservice. We become pigeon-holed into one way of living, doing, earning, striving never fully becoming who God created us to be. We have so much more to offer the world, yet we exhaust ourselves in one way of life.
themessymingling.com
If I could challenge you to one thing, it would be to spread your wings. Step out and do something different; learn something new. Give yourself permission to do the thing you’ve been thinking about but haven’t had time. Do the thing that scares you or that you know you will fail or make mistakes before you succeed. Get out there and do the thing that you know will make other people wonder why and then blow them away. I know you’ve got some good stuff this world needs stuffed way down inside. Let it out and find the gift of the freedom to live wholly in who and what you are created to be.
Love you.
Mean it.
Meg
When I Felt Seen
Flashback with me. About three years or so ago I had a meeting. I was flipping through old pictures trying to find something in particular when I stumbled upon a picture that reminded me of this day and this meeting. I met with a team …
Freedom to Believe
How I broke free from the American Church and found my faith. themessymingling.com I never realized how much the Church had a hold on my faith. Not a particular church. Just the church in general. The ways, the rules, the traditions all seemed to lead …
Hindsight
People usually look ahead in January, not back. Goals for their future self are set and resolutions made. Many go into a new year wanting to leave the previous year in the dust. I’ve spent the first few days of the new year in hindsight. It is 20/20, right. Just kidding. I had to. If I can’t laugh from time-to-time, I’ll crumble.
Looking back has actually helped me look forward. I think for some, hindsight can feel like regret. Now that you have the knowledge of today, sometimes it’s difficult to look back at the “mistakes” of your past. I see hindsight, however, not as a place for regret. Instead, I view hindsight as a place of empowerment.
Hindsight moves me towards growth, if I will allow it. Instead of regretting past actions, behaviors, and decisions, I can look at them as a motivator to grow, deepen my faith, and expand my empathy for myself and others. Hindsight is a powerful tool that can propel me towards a better version of myself.
I will not excuse or ignore past me because of a “hindsight is 20/20 so I can’t do anything about it now” attitude. Hindsight isn’t meant for us to get frustrated or discouraged that we can’t change the past. Hindsight helps us to change our future.
Hindsight isn’t a posture or place of regret. Hindsight is opportunity for empowerment and growth.
themessymingling.com
The wisdom I gain from my hindsight of 2021 was disheartening at times. I realized I spent a lot of the year looking at my tree instead of the entire forest. I made some decisions that I am embarrassed to admit today. Do I regret them? No. Because they gave me hindsight. Being able to have wisdom on this side while looking back on the other side of the calendar year helps me to see who I want to be in this new year and who I absolutely do not want to be.
Allow hindsight to be a powerful tool in your life. Don’t look at it as regret. See it as opportunity.
Hindsight has…
…given me the opportunity to expand my view from my peep hole to opening the entire door.
…enabled me to see what I am taking in and how that is effecting what I am putting out.
…helped me to chill WAY out.
…released me from the burden of caring what others’ think.
…increased and deepened my faith exponentially.
…enabled me to forgive myself.
…freed me from wanting others to conform to my ways and my beliefs.
…released me from feeling like I need to convince others of something.
…freed those around me to live their lives without my judgment.
…opened my eyes to see that every person’s journey is different & I need to let them walk it out. My only job is to with them in love.
…increased my empathy and turned it into action.
…helped me enjoy my marriage and kids like never before (& I enjoyed them a lot before hidnsight came in)
I can go on. I bet you could sit down and right a pretty incredible list of lessons learned because of hindsight, too. Let’s look at hindsight as opportunity not regret. Hindsight really is 20/20 and that’s powerful.
Algorithms, Followings, and Instagram
679. That’s my number. In the Instagram and social media world, that number is minute, miniscule, unworthy of attention. For me, it signifies freedom. When you try to step into the business of a writing ministry, numbers (unfortunately) matter. We don’t want to succumb to, …
The House: Part One
That’s when we saw it. The house that we would know-when-we-know-when-we-know. We both looked at each other and knew exactly what the other was thinking.
You’ve Changed
You know what most people don’t like? Change. They say they like it. Some may claim they thrive in change. But honestly, most of us don’t like change. We like structure. We like to know what comes next. We need to know what comes next. We are creatures of comfort. So, when you begin to change, all of a sudden the people around you don’t know what to do with you.
One of my favorite compliments these days is, “You’ve changed.” I used to hate change. Now, I welcome it. Change (hopefully) means growth in me. I don’t want to stay the same. I want to learn and grow and not dig in. Dig in. Seems a lot of us are digging in. When change approaches, we stop looking. We run and hide so change can no longer find us. We form our opinions, thoughts, and beliefs and find those agreeable to build our narrative. I don’t want to do that anymore. I want to see this world on a grander scale no longer looking through the peep hole, but seeing down the entire walk.
Maybe if we were more open to change, we’d be more open to hear.
Maybe if we were more open to change, we’d experience more peace.
Maybe if we were open to change, we’d see more of Jesus in our lives.
The messy intersection of life and faith looks like change. We should be on a constant journey of change. Our goal as Christians is to become more like Jesus each day. If that is the case, if that is what we want, then we should be in a constant state of change.
We’ve dug in. Change makes us uncomfortable and, let’s be real, we like comfort. It’s the American way…comfort. Let’s buck the system. Let’s break the rules. Let’s step into feeling a little uncomfortable and do the work of change. Your life, and mine, will grow and flourish. And maybe we will finally get to experience what Jesus talked about in John 10:10 where he says, “The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy. I came that they may have life and have it abundantly.”
Love You.
Mean It.
Meg
Read and Repost
How many times have you read a quote and almost immediately reposted it? You’re scrolling along and, B A M, someone else’s words hit you just right in the soul. You’ve gotta repost it as soon as possible. You can’t keep this wisdom from the …
Building on Sand: How We Can Dig Deeper in the American Church
Over this past year, I would post, “Dig Deeper,” in my stories on Instagram. There were many who thought they knew what I meant. But, they were wrong. SO wrong. I saw people being jerked this way and that as each new shocking headline or …
It’s Been Awhile…
A friend asked if I’d written on my blog lately. Nope. I couldn’t even remember the last time I had written in this space. Maybe I needed a break; a break I didn’t know I needed. Sometimes we need to step away for awhile. Honestly, I wrote so much every week for so long that I needed to miss it. I needed to find my passion again. I needed to find who I was and who I wanted to be in this space rather than chasing who everyone and all the algorithms were telling me to be.
It’s easy to get caught up in our spaces. Many of us don’t even realize it is happening. The days pass quickly and we haven’t looked up once. With our heads down and eyes focused on the task, we slowly lose ourselves in our work instead of our work losing itself in us. We become what we are doing instead of who we are.
We become what we are doing instead of who God created us to be.
themessymingling.com
Where are your eyes?
Where have you fixed your gaze?
Have you become what you’re focused on or have you remained true to who you are?
It’s easy to ebb and flow in this space. The pull of the world is strong like a constant magnetic force trying to pull us away from our Creator’s design and into the dull waning of the ways of our culture or state of our world. What we do should be an overflow of who we are; not the other way around.
So, I guess I needed a break. I needed my work to pour out of who I am and who God created me to be instead of allowing the outside things tell me who I am and how I should be, do, think, and respond.
Pick your head up. Look around. Ask yourself, “Who am I?” Step into who you are created to be and watch what you are trying to create come to life.
Love you. Mean it.
~Meg
The Soul Felt Its Worth
A few times in history, we unite in emotion and human will. Events occur single-handedly stopping time. We unite in feelings, thoughts, and an unstoppable motivation to do better and be better for humanity. For my generation, that time is 9/11. For others, it’s Kennedy’s …
A Thrill of Hope
I walked upstairs and started picking up. I walked into the game room and noticed the Little People nativity. This is one of my favorite Christmas items. We have had it since my twelve year old was a toddler. The boys flock to it every …
What Are We Watering?
Our souls?
Or are we watering down our faith?
There’s a lot of talk about “threshing wheat” in the Old Testament. The act of threshing wheat was to remove the grain from the stalk: separate the valuable part from the worthless. I feel this happening on multiple levels in all our lives right now. There is a sifting. Even the Church.
Threshing wheat was not easy. Removing the edible part of the wheat from the non-edible piece is laborious. Threshing is often used symbolically as a symbol of God’s judgment: an opportunity to see who truly believes God’s Word and who doesn’t.
themessymingling.com
I am learning that we have stopped watering our souls and started watering down Christianity. It didn’t happen all at once. But, little by little, we have watered down the authority, power, and grace of the Word of God. It happened so gradually, we didn’t even realize it was happening. We’ve moved farther from the Truth and closer to comfort.
We are watering the wrong thing. And God is putting us through the threshing process to rid us of the useless pieces we have gathered.
We have an opportunity right now, an opportunity like never before, to take back our souls from the Deceiver, and fill them with the valuable wheat of Scripture. It is time we let go of our Christian comforts and press into the grace that Jesus provides. It is only in this space that we truly find comfort, peace, and rest.
Threshing is happening right now whether you see it or not. God is sifting the Church in a mighty way. What will remain? The valuable. The remains will lead us to Jesus. And if they don’t, they will land on the floor discarded.
themessymingling.com
Let’s stop watering our comforts and start watering our souls.
“Behold, I have made you a new, sharp threshing sledge with double edges;
You will thresh the mountains and pulverize them,
And will make the hills like chaff.” Isaiah 41:15
Whose Your Authority
We are sitting and waitingWaiting for someone to tell usWaiting for another human to tell us it’s okay, it’s safe, this is how you do it….I’m tired of waitingI’m exhausted by other humans & our pressNot because they are bad, but because they are messyThey …
Ruined for Normal
I was sitting on my back patio. I couldn’t believe how nice it felt outside for August 1st. I live in Texas. August is usually opressive. Hot and humid. Not tonight. This night ushered in cooler temps and a nice breeze. I took it in; …
Who Can Save Us
We all want this to end. I don’t care what you believe, who you believe, or what your “truth” is right now. We all are waiting for something, anything, to save us from this madness.
Who/what will save us.
We are reaching, grabbing, chasing anything and everything that might bring us a smidgen of comfort. Every day we whisper under our breath, “I don’t know how much more of this I can take.” And then we reach for all the things that make us feel better, feel more in control, or feel the slightest bit normal.
Can I be frank? None of the things you are reaching for will save you.
There’s only one Savior.
themessymingling.com
…
Information can’t save you.
Comfort can’t save you.
Normalcy can’t save you.
You can’t save you.
Leaders can’t save you.
Money can’t save you.
Health can’t save you.
…
What a relief it is to know that none of that can save you. Because the One who actually can save you is SO much better.
…
I’ll keep this one short and simple. All the things we think will save us, all the things we reach for to bring us some small bit of comfort are fleeting. They slip through our fingers like sand. Press into the One who can save. You have a Savior. I promise He is better then anything you are reaching for.
“Jesus answered, “I am the way and the truth and the life. No one comes to the Father except through me.”
John 14:6
American Idol
God’s been doing a work on me. I think it is fair to say that He is doing a work on all of us. He’s been stripping me. What once brought me joy and comfort no longer satisfies. We hear a lot about not idolizing …
Identity Crisis
I’ve felt a shift. Have you? We are looking here, there, and everywhere to find our identity. We are grasping at many things to align ourselves with. Gender, sexual preference, political party, likes, dislikes, alumni, nationality, racial profile, what we stand for, what we hate. I’ve noticed that we are looking everywhere to find our identity except the one place where our identity truly resides.
“So God created mankind in his own image, in the image of God he created them; male and female he created them.” Genesis 1:27
Our lives are in constant conflict because we are grasping at sand and it’s slipping through our fingers faster then we can grip it. Our identity doesn’t reside in anything in this world. Our identity resides in Christ.
themessymingling.com
I had a dream about a month ago. I looked out my back door and saw someone straddling my back fence. I heard God telling the person that it was time to pick sides. No longer could this person ride both sides. She had to choose. God or not God.
I believe we are at a turning point in history. We have been given an opportunity to choose: God or no God. When you choose God, your identity is secure. You no longer have to question who you are or what you align with. You are His and you align with Truth.
"This means that anyone who belongs to Christ has become a new person. The old life is gone; a new life has begun!" 2 Corinthians 5:17
Are you tired? Exhausted? Me too. Do you know that you have a choice? You don’t have to wonder or question who you are. You are His. You are so deeply loved. He formed ever bit of you. He created you with a purpose for a purpose. You have an identity. Your identity is in Christ.
You have an identity. Your identity is in Christ.
themessymingling.com
“For we are God’s handiwork, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do.” Ephesians 2:10
Death to Life
I have found one thing that we can all agree on. Gasp. I’m being serious. What is it? F E A R We are dealing with fear in some capacity.Some of us are afraid.Some of us are not.Some of us are having a difficult time …
Living the Headlines
Hearts exposed Narrative Idols For the past few months, I’ve woken up, looked outside, and wondered what the day would bring. I start out hopeful; full of sunshine. By the end of the day, I would find myself exhausted. You, too? I started taking account …
2020: Clear Eyes, Full Heart, Can’t Lose
The Awakening
When the ball dropped at midnight on January 1, 2020 in the middle of Times Square we were excited. This year was going to be the year of vision. Each of us had our own idea of how our enlightenment would play out.
We all know what happened next.
Six months into this year and many of us have lost our sight. Our vision is clouded with everything but enlightenment.
Fear.
Hate.
Anger.
Hopelessness.
Anxiety.
Depression.
Frustration.
We are consumed with darkness that blinds instead of awakens. Can I challenge you; all of us? Maybe, just maybe, the year of vision isn’t lost. Not yet, anyway.
When we went into lockdown mode in March, a word came to me: REVIVAL. A few weeks later came REPENT. I realized none of us could have any kind of revival without taking out some of the junk. Next came HEARTS EXPOSED. I realized everyone’s hearts were exposed: fully seen. There was no place to hide.
Vision.
2020.
It’s here. Vision is here. An awakening is here.
Have you ever watched a movie and some crazy dinosaur or monster is about to annihilate the main character. You know this because the ground starts to shake. The camera pans to the ground revealing the rumbling gravel. That is what is happening across our country; across our world.
There is a rumbling.
The ground is shaking.
All of our hearts are exposed.
I don’t care where you land; what side of the fence you find yourself. It doesn’t matter if you believe in God or are an atheist. Each and every one of us is exposed. We have been given the opportunity to see. Will we take it?
themessymingling.com
In order to gain clear vision, we have to make adjustments. Just me. I know. I cannot see a thing without my glasses or contacts. Every time I see the eye doctor, he always asks me to remove my glasses. I feel exposed and vulnerable. The moment he places that thing in front of me to test a new prescription, I feel better; more secure. I can finally see again. I usually learn that I have been living with the wrong prescription. I’ve been looking through a faulty lens that’s led to me not seeing clearly. How about you After a couple of clicks and adjustments, we find the right prescription. I finally have clear vision (again).
2020 is not lost. Our vision isn’t gone. It’s only just begun. I believe there is a huge awakening happening. Blinders are being removed. Scales are falling from peoples’ eyes. What matters now is what we do with it.
Clear eyes.
Full heart.
Can’t lose.
Clear your eyes. Remove the blinders that have held you captive for too long. What have you looked at? What have you listened to? What has become your narrative? Do you need to make adjustments. What have you been blind to because it just didn’t make sense but now, now it seems more clear?
Where is your heart? Where does it rest? Is it solid on a firm foundation that cannot be shaken no matter what comes your way? Or, is your heart reactionary? You hear something and cue the emotions. Are you steady? Calm? Or irrational?
When your eyes are fixed on Jesus and your heart rests in His Truth, you can’t lose.
"Let us fix our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of our faith, who for the joy set before him endured the cross, scorning its shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God. Consider him who endured such opposition from sinful men, so that you will not grow weary and lose heart." Hebrews 12:2
Clear eyes.
Full heart.
Can’t lose.
The New Normal
Everyone is talking about a new normal. People are saying that they don’t want to go back to our old normal. I get it. There is plenty I want to leave in the past. But, that doesn’t mean we have to wipe everything out. Not …
Lamenting
Little Mermaid Style
la·ment/ləˈment/Learn to pronouncenoun
- a passionate expression of grief or sorrow.
In the Book of Psalms, David laments. He goes on and on and on about his strife and troubles. Yet, God calls David, a man after His own heart. There’s something humble in expressing our grief allowing our heart to be exposed. Sometimes, our hearts need to lament. It needs to exhale and expose all the hurt, pain, and frustration while being at peace with knowing the sovereignty of God.
The other day, I was on my Peloton taking a Disney music ride. (Stick with me) The song, Part of Your World, came on and I found it ironic. So much of what Ariel was singing, I was feeling. So, here is a little lamenting of my heart Little Mermaid style.
Part of Your World
Jodi Benson
Look at this stuff
Isn’t it neat?
Wouldn’t you think my collection’s complete?
Wouldn’t you think I’m the girl
The girl who has ev’rything?
I’m tired of staring at all my stuff; all the same stuff. I’ve purged and cleaned and organized all the stuff. I can’t organize anymore. I want to see something other then these four walls. I know I am blessed. I am grateful for the gift of this home. But, I know this isn’t all You have for me.
I want to be where the people are
I want to see
want to see ’em dancin’
Walkin’ around on those
(Whad’ya call ’em?) oh – feet
I want to get back to seeing my people. I want to see their faces and their smiles without a mask. I want to be in public with people moving about normally and not scoping each other out wondering what each other is thinking. I want to walk around with other people not worried about whose going to infect who or who is judging who for who knows what. I want to be where the people are; where we dance and walk freely without a care in the world.
Up where they walk
Up where they run
Up where they stay all day in the sun
Wanderin’ free
Wish I could be
Part of that world
I want to walk and run free not worrying about hate and fear. I want to feel the warmth of the sun on my face in a public space letting the beauty of life being lived in front of me. Wish I could be part of that world that used to be free.
What would I give
If I could live
Outta these waters?
What would I pay
To spend a day
Warm on the sand?
Betcha on land
They understand
Bet they don’t reprimand their daughters
Bright young women
Sick o’ swimmin’
Ready to stand
I want to wake up in the morning and not feel like we are instantly treading water. I want us to stop reprimanding each other and start listening to each other. I want more empathy, love, and grace. Mercy. Justice. Humility. From everyone.
And ready to know what the people know
Ask ’em my questions
And get some answers
What’s a fire and why does it
(What’s the word?) burn?
I am ready. Ready to listen. Ready to learn. Ready to hear. Ready to change. Ready to burn with discomfort. Are you ready to give me grace while I work through the mess. Are you willing to love me anyway?
When’s it my turn?
Wouldn’t I love
Love to explore that shore above?
Out of the sea
Wish I could be
Part of that world
I’m ready for my turn: my turn at peace. My turn at love. My turn at seeing Your Kingdom come and Your will be done.
“This, then, is how you should pray:
“‘Our Father in heaven, hallowed be your name, your kingdom come, your will be done, on earth as it is in heaven. Give us today our daily bread. And forgive us our debts, as we also have forgiven our debtors. And lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from the evil one.’ Matthew 6:9-13
Privilege & Lives
Why Christians shouldn’t be so quick to dismiss white privilege and black lives matter. He has told you, O man, what is good; and what does the Lord require of you but to do justice, and to love kindness, and to walk humbly with your God? Micah 6:8 Oh, …
Heard: Listening to Validate Not Agree
Scott and I got into an argument the other day. Well, it wasn’t really an argument. I was irritated with him and he was pushing my buttons. This story goes like this… I was telling him some widely reported facts (Yes, the emphasis is need. …
Are You Listening?
In times like these, we must learn to listen and listen well. Less talking. More listening. Use our two ears and close our one mouth. I don’t know about you, but this is tough for a talker like me. I like words. I also like to say all the words. What I am finding, however, is that right now it’s not my turn on the mic. Through this mess and the state of our world, I’ve identified three areas where I need to grow as a listener. (Btw, I know there are MANY more than 3 ways)
Right now, it is not my turn on the mic.
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The first is that I tense up. Think, plugging my ears singing, “lalalalalala” like a child. I don’t want to hear what they are telling me. I can’t believe it. I can’t wrap my head around what they are telling me, so I stuff it down and pretend I didn’t hear it.
The second is what I refer to as, “eye roll listening.” I just want whatever they are saying to be over with. I have heard it loud and clear, over and over. Can we just be done and move on please? I don’t want to sit in this discomfort anymore.
The third way I shut down when listening to someone else is when they challenge me. I know what they are saying holds at least a little bit of truth, but it goes against my own narrative and that makes me uncomfortable. So, instead of listening further, I shut down because they are obviously wrong. They are wrong because everything I’ve ever known tells me they are wrong. Instead of learning and growing, I stay stagnant in my stubbornness.
The thing is, we all have some sort of rhythm we live by when we listen to people talk. We have agendas and histories and cultures that define how we respond to what people say. We don’t realize that we are influenced by outside perspectives, traditions, and narratives that taint the words coming from someone else’s mouth. Because of this, we need to be mindful in how we listen.
Sometimes, what someone is saying doesn’t always merit a response. We need to ask ourselves, “Am I listening to respond or am I listening to listen?” I find myself in two categories when I am listening to someone speak.Right now, people want to be heard and validated (even if/when you don’t agree). Jesus was really good at this. Let me share a story with you from Luke 10:38-42
As Jesus and his disciples were on their way, he came to a village where a woman named Martha opened her home to him. She had a sister called Mary, who sat at the Lord’s feet listening to what he said. But Martha was distracted by all the preparations that had to be made. She came to him and asked, “Lord, don’t you care that my sister has left me to do the work by myself? Tell her to help me!”
“Martha, Martha,” the Lord answered, “you are worried and upset about many things, but few things are needed or indeed only one. Mary has chosen what is better, and it will not be taken away from her.”
Bible scholars like to teach about how Mary got it right. She knew how to worship Jesus. And Martha, well Martha was a busy body. Let’s look at this verse a different we, shall we?
Mary listened to Jesus. Her response isn’t recorded. It’s not needed because she listened without an agenda.She didn’t need to respond. She didn’t need to tell him her thoughts, opinions, or ways. Her purpose in this moment was to just listen. And Jesus noticed. Now, Jesus noticing Mary’s good listening skills did not disqualify Martha’s hard work. Martha’s hard work did not eliminate her from her importance to Jesus. Jesus just recognized that in that moment, listening is what mattered.
Listening to someone else and validating how they are feeling does not disqualify your thoughts or feelings. Instead, it shows you care. And I know you care about other humans. Listening to someone, truly hearing what they are saying, tells that person that they matter; they have value. I believe this is what Jesus did in every encounter He had with people. He listened in a way that told them they mattered. He did it in such a way that their lives were eternally changed.
Let others feel, think, and process things their own way and in their own time. Their journey is not your own. Our mission is not to change others. Instead, we are called to walk alongside them on their journey while each of you is moving towards love, grace, and redemption. That’s Jesus.
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Get out there. Listen. Sit with that person and hear them. Don’t plan your response. Just be. Inhale. Exhale. Listen. Repeat.
Divine Happiness
“Now may the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace in believing, that you may abound in hope by the power of the Holy Spirit.” Romans 15:13 I have about five Instagram influencers I follow that I like to watch their stories …
Never Gonna Let Me Down
“He isn’t here! He is risen from the dead, just as he said would happen. Come, see where his body was lying.” Matthew 28:6
“But very truly I tell you, it is for your good that I am going away. Unless I go away, the Advocate will not come to you; but if I go, I will send him to you.” John 16:7
How can emptiness be good?
Easter just passed. We celebrated the empty tomb. It felt strange and odd in this time of a pandemic. But, dare I say, it also felt cathartic and peaceful. Something about being stripped of all we know made me feel that much closer to Jesus.
When I think of the Resurrection, my mind always goes to Saturday. What did Saturday feel like to Jesus’ friends and family. Saturday must have felt like a let down. The One who they put all their hope and trust was gone. Ya, He told them this would happen. But, He also told them that He would come back. But, Saturday was quiet.
When Mary and the other ladies came upon the tomb on Sunday, it was empty. Even though they knew Jesus said this would happen, it was still shocking.
Saturday was quiet.
Sunday was shocking.
Sunday brought fulfillment. The emptiness was made full in a promise that was kept. Jesus said He would come back and He did.
Sometimes, we need to be emptied in order to be filled. We need a let down in order to be lifted up. We need to be stripped of all the things that we thought filled us in order to be fulfilled. We need Saturday in order to get to Sunday.
We are living in a Saturday moment right now. While this pandemic has awakened the Church, we are still living in Saturday. Jesus hasn’t fully resurrected us from this…yet. But, it’s coming.
Sunday is coming for us, y’all. It’s time we get excited. It’s time we allow ourselves to be filled with anticipation. Sunday is coming. And I have a feeling, this will be the greatest show.
Love and Blessings,
Meg
Good Stuff
“The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy; I have come that they may have life, and have it to the full.” John 10:10 It’s taken a month of quarantine for me to move my fingers over the keyboard. 1 Month. Like many of …
A Mighty Giant
“Those who cling to worthless idols turn away from God’s love for them.” Jonah 2:8
I have a feeling; a theory really. I’m thinking this tiny, yet mighty, virus won’t be all that big in the long run. Don’t get me wrong, I am not taking this lightly. We will grieve the loss of loved ones and absolutely need to rebuild.
The real giant will show itself and it isn’t attacking our immune systems. It’s attacking our hearts.
themessymingling.com
Look around and you will see humanity coming back to itself. People are loving people not worrying about what political party they affiliate with. Humans are giving of themselves for the sake of others. People around the globe are uniting in song and encouragement. All of us are forced to slow down and (finally) be with those we love most: our families.
Do you feel it, too?
It’s like our lives of yesterday, all the rushing, hustling, and striving have been stripped away. We are no longer able to be too busy, distracted or in competition with one another. Our love for self, our self-serving and self-indulgent attitudes have been stripped away. There is no room for the selfish.
“All who make idols are nothing, and the things they treasure are worthless. Those who would speak up for them are blind; they are ignorant, to their own shame.” Isaiah 44:9
It is like the scales have fallen from our eyes (Acts 9:1-4) and we can finally see. We see the things that we once thought were important being stripped away. The money and homes and comforts that we thought would sustain us is gone. No longer there to meet our needs. But, it hasn’t destroyed us. We are still here.
What, then, is sustaining us?
“He will sustain you to the end, so that you will be blameless on the day of our Lord Jesus Christ.” (1Corinthians 1)
Even if you don’t believe in Jesus, you can see him. I see him on balconies where people are singing and playing music together. I witness it in the children being funny and realizing their gifts and talents because they finally have some spare time. I witness it in the eyes of those who are being carried and helped by others. I’ve even caught a glimpse of the earth breathing a sigh of relief turning the waters and air clear again because her people stopped.
This stripping hurts. It’s hard. It’s uncomfortable. But it isn’t the end. It’s only the beginning of what I believe will be one of the greatest awakenings in history. Are you ready to come alive? Let’s go.
Love & Blessings,
Meg
Take It Away
DISCLAIMER: I wrote this blog post years ago…7 to be exact. Crazy how things have come full circle. The fire looks a little different these days, but the message still holds true. I hope this brings you some hope right now. “Then Nebuchadnezzar was furious …
God’s Presence Our Comfort
We keep telling our story even when our story is ugly. We keep showing up because God’s goodness, His holy presence is not equivalent to our comfort.
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Live Messy Podcast: The One About Getting to Know YOU
Live Messy Podcast
Hi.
How are you?
Have you ever asked yourself that? It is so important to get to know yourself. You can’t be content without knowing the ins and outs of you. Your energy will be all over the place if you don’t know who you are. Be challenged and motivated to find out who you are and who God created you to be by listening to our latest episode.
We would LOVE and APPRECIATE it if you could give us a review! Don’t forget to subscribe so you don’t miss an episode. Find more on Instagram @livemessypodcast or Facebook Live Messy Podcast
Let’s Get Physical
Physical health is so much more then moving your body & losing weight. Physical health is just another piece of the puzzle of your whole self. In this episode, we talk about the cultural shift from skinny to healthy (Have we really accepted this?). We …
The One About the Chakras…errr…Energy
“Energy is the life force that binds the soul to the body.” themessymingling.com Do you know what kind of energy you bring to the room? How do you respond to others’ energy around you? We don’t realize the power of our energy and the choice …
So Hard
Don’t be so hard on yourself.
themessymingling.com
I have a sister-in-law who fights for me. She fights for me to stop being so hard on myself. She sees in me what I can’t see in myself. I get texts and DMs from her encouraging me to love me better.
There’s a push for us to love ourselves. We champion self-care and self-love. While I think this is good, we have to be careful how we do this. We need to learn to love ourselves. Why? Because He first loved us. (John 3:16 )
I recently recorded a podcast (Live Messy Podcast) where we discussed how God designed us. Over and over again, I came back to the same thing. You and me? We are wonderful just because. We are wonderful just because He created us. We aren’t wonderful because of what we do or don’t do; of what we did or didn’t do. We aren’t wonderful because we succeeded when everyone else failed. We aren’t wonderful because we achieved all that we were striving for. We aren’t wonderful because we followed all the rules. We are wonderful because we are created by a Creator. (Psalm 139:14 )
So, you may be asking yourself: How do I love myself? How do I get to the place of contentment with me? Well, here are a few things I do when I’m not feeling the love for myself.
Stop trying to fit a square peg into a round hole. What works for her, may not work for you. It probably needs to be tweaked to fit you and your unique ways. We can stop chasing what she’s doing because you’re not her. When you stop forcing her life to fit into yours, you find freedom and contentment.
“I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well.”
Psalm 139:14
When you feel like a failure, when you’ve made a mistake, when you feel like you are sprinting uphill all the time and doubt yourself, let Psalm 139 be a reminder. You are wonderful. Period. Just because you are made by Him. There’s nothing you did or can do that makes you any more or less wonderful. You are wonderful because you are His creation.
“Before I formed you in the womb I knew you, before you were born I set you apart; I appointed you as a prophet to the nations.”
Jeremiah 1:5
There is a call on your life whether you believe in Jesus or not. We are all designed to do something/be something. That’s what makes this world so beautiful: we are unique. That’s why I fear this fight for unity in thought and life. I truly believe we will miss out if we fight for one thought one life argument.
‘For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.’
Jeremiah 29:11
He has plans for you. Whether or not you succeed at what you are doing, there is a plan. And sometimes that plan looks like failure, walking away, or not achieving. The plan doesn’t always look like a solution or destination. Sometimes the plan is just the journey because that journey leads you to Him.
The plan doesn’t always look like a solution or destination. Sometimes the plan is just the journey because that journey leads you to Him.
themessymingling.com
Let what others see in you sustain you when you can’t love yourself. Remember what His Word tells you. There is nothing in the Bible that tells you how awful you are. If anything, the crazy stories we find in the Bible should move you to feel a bit more normal in all your crazy and inadequacy.
I’ll make you a deal. I will remind you that you are lovable just because if you remind me. Let’s speak life into each other reminding one another that faith isn’t found in perfection. Faith is found in the mess and that mess, especially your messy self, is the most lovable of all.
Love & Blessings,
Meg
I’m Not Responsible
I received a text from a friend filled with concern. She saw some things a mutual friend was doing and it broke her heart. She knew life wasn’t found it that space but didn’t know what do. Have you ever been there? Have you ever …
The One About Contentment
I was thinking about the new year and all our goals and aspirations. There’s something about newness that inspires. Something about a fresh start propels us into action. While I believe in that whole-heartedly, I began to wonder that if and when we meet those …
Adventure Lies in the Unseen
Have you ever had that one friend that won’t celebrate you? You work so hard on something, yet she acts like it doesn’t exist. All you want is for your friend to notice. She sees others doing similar things, but she doesn’t notice you.
We all want to be seen. We want people to notice. It helps us feel like we matter. As an enneagram one, people noticing my perfectly thought out, orchestrated, completed tasks gives me life. But, I am finding that the adventure, all the good & crazy that actually matters, is found in the unseen moments of life.
I am finding that the adventure, all the good & crazy that actually matters, is found in the unseen moments of life.
Jesus lived in the unseen. He arrived in a lowly dwelling. Some translations say, “Jesus moved into the neighborhood.” I love that. He is identified as a king but his only attendants at birth were his mom and dad who were first time parents. Can you even imagine? He told his disciples on multiple occasions not to go rushing off telling people of the things He just did.
Jesus was a man who lived in the unseen. Yet, He is the most seen figure of all time.
Hmmmmmm…
I really truly believe the real adventure, y’all, is found in the unseen.
That friend that doesn’t notice you; that isn’t celebrating what you’re doing? She doesn’t have to celebrate you. She deosnt’ have to notice. Because you are already noticed and celebrated. By God. He sees. He notices. He’s celebrating. He gave you that passion; that dream. He’s stoked when He sees you walk into it.
So, what are you waiting for? What adventure can you go on and no one notices? There is more fulfillment in the unseen then the popular. Go for it. Take the adventure. Life resides in this space.
The One About Holiday Expectations
Apple Podcast Spotify Stitcher Google Play The holidays. They are upon us. There is no escaping them. Well, I guess you could lock yourself inside, hide under a cozy blanket, and watch a never-ending stream of Hallmark movies and avoid it all but who wants …
Hands Wide Open
Apple Podcast SpotifyStitcherAnchor Recognize anyone in that photo? Ha. You know what? You have a place there, too. And I bet Jesus is laughing at this. This one is about dreams…when your dreams, your hopes, your goals don’t look or turnout the way you had hoped …
Feeling It
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Our “Feeling It” series has come to an end and we are having some feelings about it. We’ve laughed, we’ve cried, and we’ve purged. We give ourselves permission to live out the human experience and F E E L. Enjoy this series and ten minute wrap-up.
We would LOVE and APPRECIATE it if you could give us a review! Don’t forget to subscribe so you don’t miss an episode. Find more on Instagram @livemessypodcast or Facebook Live Messy Podcast
I Called in Sick Today
I read a meme the other day. It said, “I called in sick today. I was sick of other people.” It got me thinking. When did our annoyance with others become the norm? Look, people are weird. We are messy and hard to get along …
SEX & MARRIAGE
Physical Intimacy. It’s a part of marriage. Or, at least it should be. If you feel overwhelmed, shamed, excited, or happy about sex in your marriage, then this episode is for you. We talk about ALL THE THINGS, giggle like 12 year old boys, & …
Swat Them Away
My Peloton bike faces three giant windows. I situated the bike this way on purpose. Nature is my thing. It re-centers me and redirects my focus. I overlook our backyard: the pool, the fire pit, the rocking chairs, and a giant Crepe Myrtle. Today, as I rode, I noticed a little bird cowering by our fence.
As I watched the bird, I realized it was one of the babies out of the nest that is in the Crepe Myrtle. Every time we’ve swam the past few weeks, we’ve checked on mama bird and looked for babies. This weekend we noticed some new additions to the nest. I quickly realized today was the first day of flight school for the baby Doves.
I lost focus of the baby bird because I got distracted. There was a family of Finches sputtering about around the Crepe Myrtle and the baby bird. Anytime one of the Finches got near the baby, mama bird would swoop in and swat them away. She’s big and was not messing around.
I watched over and over again as that mama bird flew in and knocked those Finches away from her precious baby. She was relentless. It was exquisite to watch. And, I’m not gonna lie, it helped get my mind off of what I was actually doing.
But, do you know what was the most interesting thing about this whole scenario? The baby bird had no idea what its mama was doing. He was so focused on learning to fly, so terrorized and scared of his new environment, that he couldn’t see how his mama was protecting him. All he had to do was fly. She did the rest.
Hmmmmm….
That sounds a lot like us. Am I right?
As I watched her, it made me think of my own kids. We recently had to deal with a mistake one of our boys made. It was one of a million and I was exhausted. I told my husband that I was done parenting. Like, for good. For forever. Because, as I watched that mama bird swat those Finches away time-after-time, I felt like I was watching me parent.
We are all that mama bird. We are constantly swatting the bad things away from our kids. We are their first line of defense and you better believe us mamas are unstoppable when protecting our babies. We are persistent in our swatting and our kids don’t even know. They are oblivious to the continuous movement of motherhood.
Swat.
Swat.
Swat.
As I watched her and thought of my own parenting, I realized this must be how God feels. Constantly swatting the junk away from our lives. And we don’t even realize it.
Ironically, a couple of days before this mama bird encounter, I read a quote from John Piper on a friend’s Facebook page. The quote read,
“The Sovereign Lord has spared you ten thousand more losses than He has sent you. Let every moment be a thousand thanks.”
And don’t even get me started on the fact that the mama bird was a dove. It took me a second for that to process, but when it hit me that the bird I was watching was a dove, it pierced my soul.
God is always showing Himself to us. We just have to be open to see.
A couple of days ago, He allowed me to see this quote. A few days later, I experienced a challenge with a kid swatting the bad stuff away. Today, while being pushed and challenged past my limits in a workout, God reaches out to me through the one thing that connects me most to Him (nature) through a dove. And not just any dove. A mama dove in action reminding me that while I am overwhelmed and exhausted trying to swat all the bad away from my kids, God is doing the same for me. And for you.
What do you need to swat away today? You already have the power inside you. God is swatting away for you. What do you need to swat away for Him?
Love & Blessing,
Meg
A Life Surrendered
A surrendered yes to where ever you are leading.” Ellie Holcomb Calling. Purpose. Life. These are words we contemplate to give ourselves meaning. We need to matter; have an impact on this planet greater than ourselves. We long to have purpose. But man, that can …
Live Messy Podcast
SUBSCRIBE HERE Apple Podcast Spotify Stitcher Anchor Whose the emotional one in your marriage? Who do you turn to for emotional support? Today, we talk about all the feels. Listen in and and find out how emotions can build a bridge of intimacy in marriage instead …
The Justice Idol
I am a rule follower. I believe that if you don’t follow the rules, you deserve the consequences. I was the “you cheated” and the “you’re out because you didn’t follow the rules” kid. I am a justice seeker thru and thru. Because of this, it can be very hard for me when someone doesn’t get what they deserve. I can get worked up when people wrong others but aren’t held accountable.
“You shall have no other gods before me.” Exodus 20:3
God just freed the Israelites from the bondage of slavery in Egypt. He was reminding them not to revert back to their old ways now that they were given new life. The Israelites struggled with idols. They had a longing for something physical to worship. These idols continuously tripped them up.
We have an idol. Just like the Israelites, we have something that keeps tripping us up. Our idol is causing division among us. It is tearing apart friendships and families. This idol is causing us to lose sight of what is really going on. Our idol is justice.
Hop on Facebook or Twitter and you will see this idol running rampant. We are fighting for our causes so fiercely in the name of justice. We want retribution. We desire accountability. We want justice to be served to the point of annihilating relationships with the ones we love most.
I am a justice girl. I want to see all the bad guys, the offenders, the wrong-doers brought to justice. With all my heart I want this. But, I don’t want it so much that I lose my sight. Some of us are seeking justice and judgment so heavily that we have completely lost focus on what we are fighting for; our heart behind the cause.
Justice is our idol.
When justice becomes our idol, it begins to create doubt: doubt in our world, doubt in people, and doubt in God. We forget that we live in a fallen world where justice doesn’t reign king. Sometimes justice wins. Sometimes it doesn’t. This doesn’t mean we don’t fight for it. It just means that we have perspective and remember who the true Judge is. Justice is hard to attain in a fallen society. Because of this, when justice becomes an idol and our idol doesn’t perform (just ask the Israelites how their idols served them), we become disappointed, disillusioned, and full of doubt.
“But he’s already made it plain how to live, what to do, what God is looking for in men and women.
It’s quite simple: Do what is fair and just to your neighbor, be compassionate and loyal in your love,
And don’t take yourself too seriously-take God seriously.” Micah 6:8
Here’s what I know about justice according to Scripture. We are supposed to live justly. That means our lives exude justice. We are kind, loving, and fair even when life isn’t. We are not judgmental and ready to serve others. Instead, we are full of grace and compassion even in the places where it isn’t welcome. We are humble not thinking of ourselves more highly than others. And then, we take God seriously and fully trust him. He is a God of justice. We allow him be the judge.
Justice is a noble cause. People need help fighting for justice. We should never stop speaking up when we see injustice. However, justice can never become our idol. Our fight can never be overrun by justice. Justice will come as long as we focus on the true Judge.
Love & Blessings,
Meg
Marriage: The Secrets
We just celebrated our 17th wedding anniversary two days ago. I wrote this post back when we celebrated 15. It still holds the same value today as it did a couple of years ago. While there is no secret pill to take to have a …
A Disappointing Me
A friend told me I am a tough one to crack. I am guarded. This surprised me a bit. I consider myself a people person. If I’m a people person, how can I be guarded. Her words had value. They were not met with a brick wall or emptiness from me. I didn’t brush them aside and pretend she was crazy and they weren’t true. While I am a people person, I am also guarded. And I didn’t even realize it.
I know part of it reflects being hurt by past friendships. I am healed but there are scars. There is, however, another part that goes beyond being hurt by someone else. I started doing some digging in my soul and found some things.
I am guarded because I am afraid of disappointing you. Yep. You. It’s funny because I preach all day long to women about their value and worth. I tell you to do things scared and unqualified because I know and believe that God will fill your empty spaces and inadequacies. I know this for me. I believe this for you.
I stay guarded because I believe in the deep dark depths of my soul (The parts no one sees. Not even me.) that you will be disappointed when you really get to know me. That I have created such a persona that when you get to know the real me, the messy crazy neurotic me, you will walk away.
Maybe this is because I have had friends walk away. I have had people close to me leave when the real, honest, and vulnerable me came out. Maybe I’ve led myself to believe I lie. I know it’s both.
Because my brave friend was courageous enough to speak a hard truth in my life, I can reflect, respond, and heal. Don’t ever underestimate those tough talks. Don’t run away from them. Don’t try and hide. Take their courageous love for you as the gift that it is: a gift of truth that may lead you to a freedom you never thought you knew.
Love & Blessings,
Meg
Going Rogue
Peter. Let’s talk about this guy. Peter was in the inner circle with Jesus. He hung with the crew that eventually changed the world. A group of misfits bound together by a king; a king that looked nothing like royalty. Can I be honest? Peter …
I Double Dog Dare You
bout three years ago, I latched onto a phrase with a vengeance. I wrote it on a chalkboard I kept in my office, scribbled it on a 3×5 card and kept it in my Bible. I wrote about it and talked about it all the time.
“Confidence in Christ”
I wanted women across the globe to find their confidence in the only One that matters and not look to those empty spaces like media, other women, and the like. We are so much more than we give ourselves credit for, and I wanted ladies to begin believing in themselves; seeing themselves for their true value and worth.
I preached this expression any chance I got. It became my passion. Yet, it has taken me years since grasping this saying to find my own confidence.
“Such confidence we have through Christ toward God. Not that we are adequate in ourselves to consider anything as coming from ourselves, but our adequacy is from God, who also made us adequate as servants of a new covenant, not of the letter but of the Spirit; for the letter kills, but the Spirit gives life.” 2 Corinthians 3:4-6
I don’t know if it is because I am in my forties and I just don’t care anymore, or, I am actually finally coming into my own, but I think I may have finally found my confidence in the last couple of years.
People may be shocked to hear this since I tend to be an extroverted individual. I don’t mind getting up and speaking in front of people. I tend to speak the truth to friends when most would shy away and let things slide. I take on roles that don’t fit someone who is questioning her self-confidence, yet I struggled in this space.
Confidence is hard to come by. You want to be humble and not known as the snobby one. I tend to downplay any compliment that comes my way. I like to veer the attention off of myself and onto others. I want to be comfortable in my own skin but sometimes it feels tight and uncomfortable.
I think part of what has helped me embrace my confidence is finally going after a dream. I lived for permission and acceptance from others for too long. I am done with worrying about the world’s opinion and ready to venture into some uncomfortable places in order to chase a vision I honestly believe the Lord gave me years ago. And you know what? If chasing and fulfilling this dream is solely for me, than I succeeded because I remained faithful to the calling God has given me.
Confidence cannot come from anywhere else but within.
My husband can’t give me my confidence. Neither can my friends. Social media sure as heck won’t fill that confidence bucket. If anything, it will completely deplete it instead.
“For God has not given us a spirit of fear, but of power and of love and of a sound mind.” 2 Timothy 1:7
When we lack confidence, we do so primarily out of fear. We are afraid of what others think of us (or will think of us). Or, someone told us once how bad we were at something or how unattractive we are, or how unintelligent we are, or that we are not good enough. Our self-skepticism is rooted in fear and God calls us out of fear. He tells us that we are filled with power, love, and a sound mind. If we allow fear to intimidate our confidence, we are not of sound mind.
We are built to be confident in our calling. It is how the Creator created us. He had a unique design in mind when he created you and me. It is our responsibility to walk boldly in our calling.
Honestly, at the end of the day, it doesn’t matter what other people think. The number of likes, followers, or readers does not equal your value. As long as you remain true to God and to yourself, your confidence is steadfast.
So go. Lead with exuberance because you are called to be exactly who you are, exactly where you are, at this exact moment in time. Own your space in this world. Claim it and live it out boldly. I dare you!
Love & Blessings,
Meg
The Preteen Years
...an OLDIE but a GOODIE
He was sitting at the counter, his dad beside him. It was early; before 7am. They were working through some last minute math homework. Never-mind the fact that he had ALL weekend to complete his assignment. Who am I kidding? I would have put off my homework over the weekend, too.
There is a lot of chatter out there. Chatter about how the middle schools years are scary and really really awful. Chatter about how this world will devour your child once he leaves the safety-net of elementary school. Chatter about technology and how it will kidnap your child’s mind and lead them to the registered sex offenders list for life. Chatter. Lots and lots of chatter.
Can we squash that chatter? I think so. I am here to tell you the preteen years are not to be feared. They are to be relished.
I heard it all when my oldest was in fifth grade. We mamas all started thinking about what we should expect the next year. Just like when your preschooler moves on to kindergarten, the elementary to middle school jump makes your kid seem so old; so alien. We tried to determine what this uncharted territory would hold. Since we had no experience with middle school, all we had to hold onto were stories of parents who had gone before. Eek. I didn’t particularly like what they had to say.
When I sat back on my own and thought about the season we were about to enter, I was smacked in the face with one thing: the moment my son steps foot on that middle school campus, the countdown begins.
With each passing, season, time seems to speed up. The moment he begins middle school is the moment the next seven years will ignite and zoom by at warp speed. I have one chance, one opportunity, to make these years count and I was determined in that moment to do just that.
I want to enjoy my kids. Let’s face it…life with kids is extraordinary and challenging. Parenting is no joke. You need the physical stamina of a boxer and the emotional stamina of a first responder. What I have learned in my twelve years as a parent, however, is that parenting has everything to do with perspective. (Can I get an AMEN)
If I enter these middle school years believing the chatter that they are the most awful years on God’s green earth, than that is exactly what they will be. Rather, if I pierce this road with the perspective of opportunity, an opportunity to love, learn, and watch my son grow from a boy to a man, than the whole season shifts.
It is time we shift the chatter. Middle school years (and high school, for that matter) is not a season to be feared. Instead, it is an opportunity to witness your child finding themselves. You get to see them become the adult you always dreamed and hoped they would become. What an awesome privilege. The moment you step foot into this uncharted territory, you get to watch them use those wings you have been helping them grow all these years. They will take a dive and fall to the ground a few times as they try and spread those wings. But, eventually, they will soar like you could never have imagined and it will be the most beautiful sight.
Do not fear the middle school years. They are precious. It is holy ground. You shift from teaching and training to guiding and walking alongside. You witness them make some pretty awesome choices all on their own without you. This is so very bittersweet knowing you are having to slowly let go a little more each day but reveling in the glory that is who your child is becoming. What an awesome privilege.
Middle schoolers are so weird and funny and goofy. You can tease them and mess with them in the very best ways. They do things that make you shake your head and make your chin fall to the floor (in a good way) all at the same time. Preteens are incredible beings full of a mess of hormones and growing and awkwardness. It is greatness!
I think you will be surprised when you enter those dreaded middle school years. You will be astounded to discover how much you love this time with your preteen holding so tightly to the precious years you have left with them. You will truly enjoy the shifting of your relationship from mommy to mom to confident and adviser.
The preteen years were never meant to be fretted or feared. They were meant to stretch you and grow you as a parent as you are learning and sifting just as much as they are. It is an opportunity to build relationship that will last and only be enhanced through their adult life. The preteen years are an opportunity to step back and enable your child to fall so that they may discover themselves, their faith, and who they want to be.
I didn’t think I would like the preteen years so much. I always thought of myself as a baby/toddler loving mom. But man, this whole getting to watch your kids grow up thing is nothing shy of magnificent. What an awesome privilege it is to witness these kids become who God designed them to be all along.
Stop the negative chatter. Don’t be afraid of the middle school years. This is sacred space.
There’s an opportune time to do things, a right time for everything on the earth:
A right time for birth and another for death,
A right time to plant and another to reap,
A right time to kill and another to heal,
A right time to destroy and another to construct,
A right time to cry and another to laugh,
A right time to lament and another to cheer,
A right time to make love and another to abstain,
A right time to embrace and another to part,
A right time to search and another to count your losses,
A right time to hold on and another to let go,
A right time to rip out and another to mend,
A right time to shut up and another to speak up,
A right time to love and another to hate,
A right time to wage war and another to make peace.
But in the end, does it really make a difference what anyone does? I’ve had a good look at what God has given us to do—busywork, mostly. True, God made everything beautiful in itself and in its time—but he’s left us in the dark, so we can never know what God is up to, whether he’s coming or going. I’ve decided that there’s nothing better to do than go ahead and have a good time and get the most we can out of life. That’s it—eat, drink, and make the most of your job. It’s God’s gift.
Ecclesiastes 3:1-13
The preteen years: they are a precious gift from God .
Love & Blessings,
Meg
Quiet Time Drop Out
I had good intentions with my quiet time. I sat down, lit my candle, got my pen and journal ready (I forgot to tell you that journaling during quiet time was an absolute must), and opened my Bible. I prayed. And then my brain started wandering.
You Have What It Takes
You ARE valued.You ARE valuable.You ARE worthy.You ARE highly favored.You ARE loved.We need YOU. My youngest was taking a bath in my bath tub while I was getting ready for bed. We were chit-chatting about things when he noticed a 3×5 card on my mirror. …
The One About Emotions
What kind of home did you grow up in? Was it loud and boisterous like mine? Or quiet and reserved like Sarah’s? In this week’s episode, Sarah and I talk about how we dehumanize ourselves as moms. We believe that hiding our emotional state protects our kids. When, in actuality, it hinders them. We talk about the importance of showing our emotions and talking about them with our children. It is imperative that our kids see us feel and that they understand emotions are okay.
Listen in and be challenged and encouraged.
Who Runs the World? Girls.
Do not ever underestimate your value and worth especially when it comes to the Kingdom of God. You very much have a place in this story and God will and is using YOU. God did not create Eve just to hang out and make dinner. He had a place for her just as much as he had a place for Adam.
Don’t Lose You
W hen Jackson was a baby, I would hop into my car on my lunch break and rush to his day care to see him. I had thirty minutes with my baby and I needed every last second. I was a mess of a new …
The One About the Path
You know what’s scary? Letting your kids walk the path in front of them. We watch them weeble and wobble making that crazy mom gasping sound as they sway side-to-side. We want to run and catch them; straighten them up so they don’t fall. But, what we don’t realize is, that in doing so, we are robbing them. We are stealing experiences away from them because we are scared they might get hurt. But that hurt, it makes them stronger. It builds their character. It develops them into the incredible humans they are meant to be.
In this episode, we talk about how saying no when we can say yes is actually a good thing. We also work through our mix-up of trying to prepare the path for our kids instead of preparing our kids for the path. It takes a lot of trusting God knowing that He’s got them. We can do it…especially when we do it together.
Listen in and be encouraged and empowered.
Dear Anxiety,
It’s funny what our minds will believe. It’s crazy how easily our thoughts become our truths. We know that our anxieties are false narratives, but we still believe them.
Take a Lap
It is easy to look at our older kids and think they’re a good kid; they are older and don’t need me as much.
Episode 11: The One About the Journey
Y’all. You do not want to miss this episode. I’m not just saying it because I am a host of this show.
In this episode, our friend, Kristen, joins us and tells us her journey of self-worth and believing in herself. It doesn’t matter where you are, what stage you are in, or what your goals are. Kristen’s story is so relatable and inspiring.
So, what are you waiting for? Click that link and take a listen. You won’t regret it!
Avengers End Game: How Super Heroes Gave Me Hope
The moment they uttered those words I thought of Jesus. In the middle of an Avengers movie, I thought about my faith.
Episode 9: The One About the Money
Episode 9 is all about bringing your dreams to life. We all have something burning inside us yearning to get out. But, too many of us sit on it because we don’t know how to market ourselves. Or, the thought of “selling our-self” makes us feel uneasy.
Listen to this episode and hear my therapy session with Sarah. I needed to hash this out, too. We talked about so many things but, it all kept circling back to self-worth. You gotta have it to make those dreams come alive.
Let’s all do a better job of believing in the God-breathed dreams in each of us. And let this episode serve as a reminder that you ARE valuable.
Raising Puppies is Like Raising Kids Which is Like Finding Grace
Grace is not a chase. Grace is a journey of discovery. A discovery of how much you are loved.
Episode 8: The One About Activating Your Dreams
You know what your dream is, now what? How do you activate that dream? In this episode, Sarah and I talk about how to live in an active state and how to sustain it. We talk about how the middle is the sweet spot but …
Move Out
A few months back, I decided to make a theme for myself for each month. I try to use the first letter of the month for the first letter of my theme. March was, Make Room to Grow. April brought me Always Be Kind. And May? May is gonna be tough.
Move Out of Your Own Way
Do you ever get in your own way? I do. Doubts. Fears. Insecurities. Listening to the wrong voices. Listening to my own voice. I get in my way and it is time I step aside.
I thought this post was going to be more dream driven but, what I am finding is that it is driven by faith. I don’t know about you, but I can get in my own way when it comes to my faith. I want answers. I want to figure God out. Sometimes, I wonder if I really believe all this stuff. I get in my head and I can’t get out.
- What is real?
- What is fake?
- Can this really be true?
‘He called a little child to him, and placed the child among them. And he said: “Truly I tell you, unless you change and become like little children, you will never enter the kingdom of heaven. Therefore, whoever takes the lowly position of this child is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven.’ Matthew 18:2-4
Kids don’t question. I mean, they question us (like, a million bazillion questions a day). But, when it comes to believing, when they are little, they just believe. They don’t get in their own heads. They don’t need all the answers or to figure it all out. They just believe. I want some of that.
In John 14:15-21 (click the link to read), Jesus tells his friends about his departure. He doesn’t fully leave them, though. Instead, he leaves an advocate; the Holy Spirit. Listen, I know talk about the Holy Spirit freaks people out, but stick with me.
We listen to outside voices; too much on most occasions. These outside voices are only speaking based on their experiences and their opinions. We are so quick to believe their truths but don’t hold tight to that pit-of-your-stomach gut feeling. That feeling is the Holy Spirit. The more aware we are of the Holy Spirit, the more we learn about God. Lean into that.
I’ve got to move out of my own way; get out of my own head. I don’t know about you, but I need to stop trying to figure God out. My hunt for answers are keeping me from God; from a full life of faith.
We need to create space to rest in the mystery of God. We can still learn about him: about his character, his attributes, his plans, and his promises without getting wrapped up in figuring God out.
Learn about his character and his love for you. This is where you will find God. This is where you will find that abundant life you hear about.
This May, let’s all move out of our own way and let God in.
Love & Blessings,
Meg
American Christian
Are you American? Are you a Christian? If you say you’re American, most assume you are Christian. Have you ever wondered why that is?
Episode 6: The One About the Dreams
Do you have a dream? If time. money, and circumstances weren’t an issue, what is the one thing you would do? What is hidden in your heart that you want to do but are too scared to speak out loud?
In this episode, Sarah and I talk about how we found our dreams and began making them a reality; changing our dialogue from dream to goal. There’s been a lot of rejection and detours, but what we found is that those “no’s” only made our dreams better. Failing only propels you forward not backward. And all those voices and haters don’t matter because this is YOUR dream and this world needs you.
Listen in and be encouraged…
I watched Passion of the Christ with my kids. Here’s how it went…a throwback
I got the crazy idea to watch The Passion of the Christ with my boys on this Good Friday. From the moment I saw the film, I knew I wanted my children to see it and I didn’t even have any kids when the movie first came out. We can never know the brevity of the sacrifice Jesus made for us. This movie gives us a small glimpse into that reality and that’s what I wanted my kids to see: reality. Not some fairy tale.
Why Homosexuality is Good for the Church
I want to take a bull horn into every congregation and tell everyone that it is okay to stop being silent. It’s okay to step into difficult conversations. It’s okay to dig deeper into what you believe. It’s okay to listen. It’s okay to love. Loving others isn’t scary. It doesn’t say that you affirm every single thing they do. It says you care. It shows you value their humanity. That’s Jesus.
Small Moments. Big Impact.
We’ve been fed a lie. Did you know that? We’ve been fed the lie that big matters.
Big moments.
Big faith.
Big following.
We sit in our little lives and wonder how we can have the big moments so we can have meaning. Thanks to social media and the viral trend, we are led to believe that only the big stuff matters. All that small stuff? That’s the stuff that matters.
I look at Jesus’ life and all I see are small moments. Besides his crucifixion, everything he did was small. From his birth throughout his ministry, Jesus was intention with small moments. I think of the lives he touched and changed because he was passionate about who and what was right in front of him. That is where he lived.
One of Satan’s biggest ploys and biggest lies of our day is that the little stuff is meaningless.
We can see it throughout our generation. People are depressed, anxious, and isolated because they feel worthless. Their lives add no value to this world because they are too small. That is a bold-faced lie.
Jesus’ name is know globally because he chose to live small. He chose to focus on the one person, one moment, and one miracle knowing that that one thing would have the greatest impact for all mankind for eternity.
If Jesus’ life is any consolation to you, let it be an encouragement for you to live out the life right in front of you without hesitation.
Send that one text.
Love those babies.
Take care of your home.
Invite that neighbor over for dinner.
Run that errand for your friend whose overwhelmed.
Wash your families’ laundry so they don’t have to go naked.
It all matters.
The small stuff…it has the greatest impact.
Stop believing the lie that you need to have a platform to add value to this world. Stop believing the lie that you have to have the big traumatic story that led you to Jesus for your faith to matter. It all matters. All of it comes together in one chaotic mess to make the most beautiful story. A story of redemption and grace that is far too valuable to waste.
Small Moments = Big Impact.
Love & Blessings,
Meg
Center Stage
Are you searching for something in your life fully convinced that it has to be BIG? Do you feel like you aren’t valuable because you aren’t on a stage? Your life is meaningless because you don’t have a huge impact?
There’s a Band-aid for That
My baby is turning 9 in a month. My oldest is turning 13. If I could insert a gasp emoji, I would post a million. Time is a thief. Life goes by in a flash.
One day (sooner rather then later), these boys will grow up and move out creating a life of their own. While this excites me, it also breaks my heart a little.
This past weekend, our youngest commandeered my iPad. The night before I was to fly out, he told me he didn’t feel well. I knew he was fine. He was just missing mommy already. So, I told him he could text or FaceTime me anytime he wanted. Little did I know, I would receive FaceTime calls from the potty. He definitely took advantage of having full access to me anytime he wanted or felt sad. It was hilarious most of the time. And, if I’m being honest, this mama heart of mine loved it; every second of it.
The iPad extravaganza reminded me how much I love to be needed by my boys. I remember having a conversation with my husband not too long ago about how these kids weren’t going to need me anymore. It made me sad. My whole life is dedicated to those boys. What ever was I going to do with myself when they didn’t need me anymore?
My job isn’t to keep them needing me forever. My job is to love and release them.
It’s easy for us as mamas (dads, too) to desire a happy life for our kids. We don’t want them to hurt and I get that. I remember a recent conversation with my middle-schooler that ushered in all the feelings. He told me what was happening and my heart had a flash back. All the emotions from when I experienced a similar situation rushed in and I didn’t want him to feel it. But he did. Because he needed to.
We want to keep our kids from hurting and suffering, so we plow the road before them making it smooth. We think we are keeping them from harm. But, what we are really doing is preventing them from learning how to cope harming them deeper then if we allowed them to work through the pain in the first place.
Our kids are going to fall and get banged up. And you know what? There’s a band-aid for that.
Jesus was on this earth for a short 30+ years. He didn’t stick around to hold the hands of his disciples. In actuality, he said it was better for him to go (John 16:7) Jesus, if anything, paved a rough road for his friends. He was crucified, for goodness sake. But, he knew it was better if he let go and let them fly.
Jesus left so his friends could flourish trusting the training they received under his guidance and care. The same holds true for us, parents.
Train them up and let them fly. (Proverbs 22:6)
Parenthood is tough. Letting go of them? That’s even tougher. But, it’s what we are supposed to do.
Give them space to fail. And watch them shine when they get back up.
Let them be rejected. And watch their creativity and tenacity flow as they prove themselves again.
Allow their heart to break. And watch them become strong, yet empathetic, humans.
Let them scrape their knee. There’s a band-aid and kisses for that.
Our kids need to feel, need to fail, and need to hurt. Taking this from them is one of the greatest travesties of our generation as parents. We are robbing our kids of an opportunity to grow, strengthen, build their character, empathize, believe in themselves, build the fight within their spirit, empathy for others, and so much more.
Jesus knew leaving his disciples would change the world. He knew his absence would make them stronger. He knew the only way his kingdom would grow is if he let them go.
Let them go. Trust in your parenting. Trust in your kid. And trust in your God. He’s got them. And when they fall and get hurt, know that there is a band-aid for that.
Love & Blessings,
Meg
Battered & Bruised: Christianity & Legalism
“We are all just doing the best we can moving along the road of faith. We were never meant to do all the things on the list. If we were capable of that, we’d have no need for him.”
Momo No Mo: YouTube and the Rise of Parenting Scared
If I open my feed and see Momo one more time, I may take a hammer to my device. If you haven’t seen this terrifying puppet thing with a creepy and distorted Snap Chat filter, consider yourself lucky. It’s like a character straight out of a Tim Burton horror movie.
The Momo Epidemic
I like to call this the “Momo Epidemic”. A terrifying article about our kids goes viral and we lose our minds. We read with mouths wide open in disbelief wondering how on earth our kids’ world ever got so bad. The moment we process the last period of the article, we call the kids down for a family meeting. No prayer first. No consideration or time to process what we just read. No. We have an immediate knee-jerk response to call the kids down, gather all their devices never to be returned again. Or, we begin to Marie Kondo their tablets and smart phones deleting anything and everything that has the potential to attack our children.
Can I tell you something? Momo is nothing new. Evil and darkness has been a part of this world since day one. When I was a kid, it was Ouija boards and the tail of Bloody Mary. Evil was just as alive and active way back when as it is today. It’s just morphed into a different form.
For God has not given us a spirit of fear, but of power and of love and of a sound mind. 2 Timothy 1:7
Are articles informative? Absolutely. Should these viral posts be what triggers our parenting? Absolutely not. Articles and viral posts should be an add-on to what we are already doing. It is time we stop looking up from our phones after a creepy face pops up and start parenting from looking up from our Bibles.
It is time we stop looking up from our phones after a creepy face pops up and start parenting from looking up from our Bibles.
Before you stop reading, let me explain. Momo is out there. Momo has always been out there. Evil will take on whatever form necessary. Do not be so consumed by fear. That is not the place God desires us to parent from. We are not unaware of Satan’s schemes. Lest we forget that God has given us protection from the evils and darkness in this world and it is not found on Facebook. It is found in the Book. And, He’s given this to us so that we may give it to our kids.
Don’t be scared. Evil is no surprise to God. Read the Old Testament. There was a whole-heck-of-a-lot of evil way back when. But, here’s the good news: we are victorious in this fight. Victorious.
I know I can do a much better job parenting my boys from the Word rather then Facebook. I can improve on reading more about how God designed me to parent and how my children are designed to receive discipline and guidance from the Bible rather then consuming more articles posted in my feed.
Momo is out there. And if it’s not Momo, it’s something else. Stop running from evil (& let’s stop teaching our children to run) because it will chase you down Start running towards evil, instead, putting on your full armor of God knowing the you AND your children are victorious because you have equipped them with the right weapons to defeat the darkness that tries to infiltrate their lives.
Stop running from evil because it will chase you down. Start running towards evil, instead, knowing you are already victorious in this fight.
I know we, as parents, want to protect our children at all costs. We would do anything to keep them wrapped securely in a safe bubble. Unfortunately, that is not possible. What is possible is the ability to empower our kids with the necessary tools to be able to combat evil when it enters their world; because it will enter their world.
Look, I’m not saying we ignore these things. But, they can’t be our primary source. Let them serve as a reminder of what God has already told us: there is a very real enemy out there and he comes to seek, kill, and destroy us. What better way to do this than through our kids.
Don’t be parent scared. Stop allowing viral posts to prompt you to parent from a place of fear. Instead, parent from the Bible equipping your children with truth. Parenting from this place elicits peace and enables our kids to have the power when evil tries to get in.
I did it wrong. I parented from a reactionary state and didn’t take time to process. I didn’t allow discernment to enter the equation. I just jumped. And because of that, my son has a vision he created in his mind that he can’t shake. Because I didn’t take a second to pray and ask God to guide me in how to maneuver this situation first, I didn’t give my boys the proper tools to combat this evil. Because of this, I allowed fear to enter their lives.
One day, these little boys are going to be grown. They won’t have me or their dad to help them handle the evils of this world. It is our responsibility to train them up (Proverbs 22:6) with power confident in their ability to run towards evil when it arises because they know they are equipped to fight it.
It is no surprise to anyone that parenting is hard stuff. All of us strive to do what’s best hoping for the best. And just when we feel like we are on top of our game, something like this comes along and knocks us down. Momo is a good reminder to us all that evil is out there and very present in our world. Let this reminder not scare us but empower us to fight that much harder against the darkness of our world. The fight begins in the Word. Start there.
Love & Blessings,
Meg
I have something to say
Reckless love. It is a necessity. Our kids are longing for it. And so is the parent sitting next to you. None of us deserve a reckless love. No one can earn a reckless love. Yet, when we were a foe, He still loved us. If we are privy to such a love, we must be that much more willing to give it all away.
#sparkjoy
Too many of us are living distracted or too busy searching for happiness that we are missing the opportunity to enjoy the life right in front of us.
Bloom
I ran into a friend in the shaving cream aisle at Target. We hadn’t seen each other in quite some time and started to catch up. She was overwhelmingly exhausted due to motherhood. I, being on the other side of motherhood, was able to tell her it wasn’t always going to be this way. And what better place to talk our motherhood whoas out then with a Starbucks and red cart? Am I right?!?!
When I got home, I had a vision. I remembered what I felt like when I was in the throws of motherhood. At one point, I had an infant, one year old, and four year old. Even though I loved being a mom, I felt depleted and exhausted most days. I got the vision of a tree in the winter. The branches are stark. The tree is barren. Nothing is blooming. Then, all of a sudden, as spring nears, a bloom bops through. And another bloom. And another until the tree is full of wondrous colors.
The tree is me. I felt stark and barren when the boys were little giving my everything to them. I was depleted. As the boys got older, I began to rediscover myself. All of a sudden, one bloom popped out. Then another. And another until my tree was full again.
Motherhood is magical. It is also exhausting. We tend to neglect and reject ourselves in order to care for these precious souls entrusted to us. At some point, though, our barren trees need to bloom again. That won’t happen unless you’re willing to water it.
It is time we stop neglecting and rejecting ourselves.
Our trees will remain desolate as long as we neglect and reject ourselves. For some reason, we have convinced ourselves that sacrificing all of us is what motherhood (and life) is about. I am here to tell you that you are no good to those kiddos (or anyone for that matter) if you don’t love yourself.
“Even before he made the world, God loved us and chose us in Christ to be holy and without fault in his eyes. God decided in advance to adopt us into his own family by bringing us to himself through Jesus Christ. This is what he wanted to do, and it gave him great pleasure.” Ephesians 1:4-5
God loved you before he created the world. Can you believe that? He wanted you to be a part of his family because it made him happy. No matter how depleted, exhausted, unworthy, or depressed you may feel today, know that the God of the universe loved you so much that he thought of you before he placed on star in the skies. He loves you so much that he created you to be a part of his family because it makes him happy.
You are worthy to bloom. You were never meant to stay in a barren season. There is something in you that he created that brings him great joy. Stop neglecting and rejecting yourself and find that thing.
You are worthy of more.
It is time your barren tree starts to bloom. There is too much beauty within you to be withheld.
Bloom.
Stop neglecting and rejecting yourself and bloom.
We need you to bloom.
Love & Blessings,
Meg
Guaranteed Strategies to Grow Your Following
Are you a follower or are you following? Too many of us are looking for public affection to heal us on the inside. We long for likes and follows to fill our cup. Instead, we are left empty and hopeless. It is no wonder half of us feel lonely. We are trying to find our confidence in the wrong place.
Equality DOES NOT = Same
I am afraid we have confused equality with sameness. While we were created equally, we were never meant to be the same.
Lens
Have you ever been so devoted to your point of you, your way of living, or what you thought to be true that you cannot see any other way?
Or, have you ever picked up a Bible or book, began reading, and felt like you were reading another language?
What happened when you finally saw another way? How did you feel? Freedom? Relief? Fear? Frustration?
There is a guy in the Bible named Paul. He was once known as Saul; a well-educated man who condemned Christians. He not only condemned them but murdered them.
Until, he met God.
Paul while highly educated, was spiritually blind. He could not see the goodness of God. So, God physically blinded Paul for a moment. (You can find his story here Paul’s Journey https://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=Acts+9%3A1-19&version=NIV )
Paul could not see through someone else’s lens. He was blind to the other side. Because of this, he lived a life of condemning others for their lifestyle and beliefs. It wasn’t until God physically blinded him that he began to really see.
We are no different from Paul. We have our blinders on only seeing through our lens subconsciously condemning those who don’t live, work, or believe like us.
What lens do you look through?
When we stay stuck looking only through our lens, we become part of the problem. When we refuse or exclude ourselves from seeing through someone else’s lens, we shift from grace to condemnation. We lose the ability to love well when we only see through our own lens.
When we refuse or exclude ourselves from seeing through someone else’s lens, we shift from grace to condemnation
What lens are you looking through? When hard issues come your way, are you more apt to see from the other side or stay stuck in your corner?
When we enable ourselves to look through someone else’s lens, we open the door to opportunity: opportunity to show others the love and grace we know and experience every day.
Saul was blind. He only allowed himself to see through his own lens. Because of this, he spent part of his life murdering people for their beliefs. The moment he became Paul was the moment not only his life, but so many lives changed. Paul is one of the greatest authors and missionaries of the New Testament. Countless lives are changed for eternity all because he chose to look through someone else’s lens.
Don’t be afraid to see from another side. It isn’t something to fear. It doesn’t mean they are going to convert you or take over in all their “badness”. Allowing yourself to see from someone else’s lens opens the door to eternity. I want to be a part of that. Don’t you?
Take the scales off your eyes.
Expand your lens.
Open the door to hope.
Love & Blessings,
Meg
Lonely
Loneliness is an epidemic. More people are lonely today then ever before. Yet, we are more connected then ever before. Maybe it is time we stop being scared of loneliness and learn how to be alone.
Happy
Are you happy? If so, where do you find your happiness? If not, what is preventing you from being happy? True happiness does not lie in life circumstances. No. Happiness is found in something so much greater.
A Healthy You: Going Against the Norms
"For you formed me in my mother's womb. I will praise You, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made." Psalm 139: 14
The new year brings a desire for a new you. Whether that be a new body, mind, or spiritual thing, we all tend to make goals at this time. We don’t always speak them out loud or even acknowledge our need for change, but it is there. Many of us want more: more structure, more organization, more exercise, more healthy eating, more calm and loving parenting. We strive to do better and be better. While that is not a bad thing (to do better and be better), our strategy may be a little off.
We are constantly told how we can do better and be better. Our inboxes are flooded with the latest craze to a healthy lifestyle or the ten ways to move up in our careers. Our social media feeds seem to read our minds and strategically place ads that are like cryptonite to our floundering souls. It is hard for us to turn off the noise. So very hard.
What if doing better and being better doesn’t look anything like what society and culture are telling us? What if we can actually DO and BE better without all that nonsense? I believe we can.
A healthy you isn’t equal to a smaller pant size.
A healthy you isn’t obtained by climbing the corporate ladder.
A healthy you isn’t maintained by having everything in its place at all times.
A healthy you isn’t found in striving.
A healthy you is found in resting in who you were created to be. A healthy you is obtained when we stop striving and start living. A healthy you is discovered when you realize the season you are in and accept it as good. A healthy you starts not in what the world tells us to do to get healthy, but rests solely on His truths and His promises for our lives.
Your value does not lie in the number on the scale.
Your worth is not secured by what you do or don’t do.
You are worthy because you are His.
A healthy you starts with a healthy mindset. A healthy mindset is found in Him: knowing that you are loved just because you are you. Nothing more. Nothing less.
Let’s start there. Let’s start by accepting we are loved so that we may love ourselves.
You are fearfully and wonderfully made. You cannot do anything to become healthier until you accept this; until you start loving yourself. You cannot love yourself fully until you realize that you are loved; loved no matter what just because you are YOU.
We can all chase that smaller pant size, cleaner home, or big promotion, but it won’t fill us. We will obtain these goals and then what? If we don’t love ourselves because He first loved us, we will never be filled. And if we are never filled, we will never find true health.
A healthy you is found in love. Knowing that you are loved by a Savior created with purpose, on purpose, and for a purpose. Find a healthy you this year by finding love: love for yourself just because you are YOU.
Love & Blessings,
Meg
Raising Thinkers
I like to tell my kids what to do. I’m just being honest. I like feeling like I have some semblance of control over their lives. It makes me feel safe. It helps me feel like nothing bad can happen to them. I know this …
Feeling Good
We all have feelings. We all also run and try to hide from our feelings. We lose living a full life when we run. We lack closeness with Jesus when we try and hide from our emotions. Stop running and start feeling. You will be thankful that you did.
Word
I have a word. A couple of years ago, I jumped on the word-of-the-year bandwagon. Just like the colored jeans and booties trends, it took me awhile to catch on. What can I say? I tend to be a stubborn rebel unwilling to immediately accept the fads of the day. I will say, that once I accepted the word challenge, I was all-in.
My word for 2018 was, “expectant.” I started a new journey chasing after a dream I’d been talking about for a loooooooong time. The word, expectant, came as I said, “yes”. The moment I stepped into the reality of taking my dream to a goal, I became expectant; expectant of what the Lord was going to do. I mean, he called me into this place. Surely, I could expect great things from him.
As 2018 was coming to a close, I revisited my word a few times. If I’m being honest, it stung. I had high expectations and most went unfulfilled. Yes, exciting and wonderful things happened throughout 2018. I learned so much, grew more than I have in a very long time, and was given incredible opportunities. However, my ministry didn’t blow up like I had imagined. It didn’t grow as quickly as I desired. I was expectant, and, if I am being frank, 2018 did not meet my expectations.
I.
I expected.
My expectations.
Ouch. Once I started processing my disappointments, I realized why I was disappointed; why it didn’t seem that God met my word for the year. I created the expectations. I decided what this year would look like and told God, “Here’s what I got. Now make it happen.”
Ever been there? Ever tell God your expectations; given him the script and told him to make it work?
Once I realized what I had done, I prayed. I knew I needed to have a chat with God about my control issues. After admitting my wrong-doing, I asked God to show me where he exceeded my expectations; where he fulfilled the dreams in my heart. Do you know what I found? A year full of gifts.
I believe God gives us words. I believe he speaks to everyone in the way they need to hear. I absolutely believe my word, expectant, was from him. It was my gift from him for the new year. What I did with that word, however, was on me not him. He gave me a year that went above and beyond my expectations. I was just blind to it because I manipulated my word.
Do you have a word for 2019? I do. I actually have a word and a phrase…I think. When you find your word, lay it down. It is time we surrender our words. He gives them to us as a gift. When we lay it down, we get to open that gift with each new day. Don’t underestimate God by trying to control your word. Don’t limit the possibilities of your word by trying to write the rest of the narrative. Find your word. And lay it down.
LORD, I know that people’s lives are not their own; it is not for them to direct their steps. Jeremiah 10:23
Love & Blessings,
Meg
When God says, “Lay it Down”
We all have a word. Maybe you don’t have a word. Instead, you have a thought, a goal, or a dream. You might not be a New Year’s resolution type, but we all want more for our lives. My word for 2018 is expectant. I …
The Soul Felt its Worth
A few times in history, we unite in emotion and human will. Events occur single-handedly stopping time. We unite in feelings, thoughts, and an unstoppable motivation to do better and be better for humanity. For my generation, that time is 9/11. For others, it’s Kennedy’s assassination or the attack on Pearl Harbor. Those around the world are united fighting for the wane of suffering. It’s there. For all of us.
There is another time in history in which all humanity stopped and gasped. I often wonder what it felt like the night Christ was born. CNN was not there to report on the horrific birth conditions. FOXNews didn’t show up to share the good news. It was a quiet night. But, I still wonder if the earth shook. Did it stop on its axis?
One of my very favorite Christmas songs is, “O Holy Night.” One line in that song clenches my attention like no other.
“And the soul felt its worth”
The Lord appeared and the soul finally felt its worth.
Do I feel my worth? Do you?
I wonder what you and I would feel that beautiful night the sky beautifully lit with stars as far as the eye could see. Would we feel our worth the moment our Savior was born? Do we feel our worth the moment we decide to follow Him? Do we realize that his birth was meant so we may feel our worth?
This season, when I look to the night sky remembering a baby born in a manger to a teen mom, I want my soul to feel its worth. If I don’t allow myself to feel my worth in him, then his birth is meaningless for he came for me; for you.
I pray we all exhale Christmas morning. That our breath reminds us of our fullness. I pray we feel united in the glory of God when we look up at the vast night sky spotting the North Star. I pray we find our worth as we walk through the journey of this advent season. We are worthy because a teenage girl unabashedly said yes to God. We are worthy because a teenage boy decided to walk alongside his pregnant fiance. We are worthy because he was born. Feel your worth this Christmas for through him and by his birth, you are worthy.
” O holy night!
The stars are brightly shining
It is the night of the dear Savior’s birth!
Long lay the world in sin and error pining
Till he appear’d and the soul felt its worth.
A thrill of hope the weary soul rejoices
For yonder breaks a new and glorious morn!
Fall on your knees
Oh hear the angel voices
Oh night divine
Oh night when Christ was born
Oh night divine
Oh night divine
Led by the light of Faith serenely beaming
With glowing hearts by His cradle we stand
So led by light of a star sweetly gleaming
Here come the wise men from Orient land
The King of Kings lay thus in lowly manger
In all our trials born to be our friend
Truly He taught us to love one another
His law is love and His gospel is peace
Chains shall He break for the slave is our brother
And in His name all oppression shall cease
Sweet hymns of joy in grateful chorus raise we,
Let all within us praise His holy name”
Love & Blessings,
Meg
Let Them GO
I bawled my eyes out pulling away after dropping my babies off at sleep-away camp. I couldn’t wait to get to FaceTime my oldest while he was on his missions trip. The fish died and I couldn’t resurrect him. On the first day of school. …
A New Adventure: My Story
I never set out to be a writer. When I was younger, like many girls, I thought I would be discovered and become a famous actress. As I entered college, I headed down the track to become a psychologist. I quickly determined the cost and …
Who Am I?
I started watching two of my favorite designers begin their renovation on a new space. I was instantly inspired. My brain started churning thinking of ideas. How could I do what they were doing but on a smaller scale? I literally wanted to jump off of my couch and into their shoes. I wanted to be beside them scheming and planning designing the beautiful space.
Has that ever happened to you? You are scrolling Tik Tok, Instagram, or Pinterest and all of a sudden you desire to be transported to their space doing their thing? You forget for a moment (or maybe longer) that you and your space are just as dynamic. You don’t remember that you, too, are creative in your own beautiful way. You also inspire others, even if you don’t know it. Yet, you see them doing your thing and you want it. I had to remember who I am. I snapped out of my wanting to be them doing their thing and remembered that me and my thing are just as tremendous even if it’s not televised.
We spend an awful lot of time getting caught up in other people’s lives. We get sucked into their stories on social media and reality TV forgetting that our reality is just as beautiful. Instead of using these things as tools to inspire, we forget who we are and get lost in wanting their life. When we put the phone down, turn off the TV, and look around, we are reminded that our very own lives are a creative masterpiece.
I had to remind myself of who I am in that moment. The things I bring to this world and the people around me are just as inspirational and encouraging as those I see as I scroll. Your life and mine has just as much value and meaning as theirs. We just have to live it. Sometimes we miss opportunities to express ourselves in the fullness and richness of life because we are too distracted by theirs. What would happen if we started living fully in our own space?
My niece recently told me she is going to take next year off of social media. It’s not necessarily a problem for her. But, it is a distraction: a distraction from living her actual life. She wonders what she’s maybe missed because she was too busy watching Tik Tok and not looking up. I often wonder that, too. What did I miss doing because I was too busy watching her do it?
Here’s to our living our own beautiful, mundane, boring, creative lives! Here’s to mess ups and mistakes; to learning something new and excelling. Here’s to being exactly who we are today knowing that a year from now, we will most likely be a different version of ourselves. Here’s to us enjoying this age and stage and being fulfilled and content. Here’s to living.
Love you.
Mean it.
Meg
A Little Bit of Hope: What About Prayer
A Little Bit of Hope Podcast I want to give you a little bit of hope when it comes to praying. I believe we’ve overcomplicated prayer by rationalizing God. We say things like, “God answered my prayer” or “God must have another plan for my …
A Little Bit of Hope: Finding Faith Outside of Church Norms
A Little Bit of Hope Podcast How do you keep hope when your faith doesn’t look like or follow the church norms? In this episode, I talk about how I found hope outside the four walls of church. It meant leaving a church I loved …
A Little Bit of Hope: The Art of Letting Go
In this episode, we chat about how hope is found in letting go. Everyday I answer a question: What is one thing you need to let go of? At first, I didn’t like this question. It felt intrusive and honestly, a little hard. It wasn’t until I started practicing the art of letting go did I find hope in the process. May this short 10 minute episode give you a little bit of hope to let go of something today. I would love to connect with you on Instagram @megankfish, on Pinterest @MeganKFish, or on my blog at themessymingling.com
The First Renovation
On this week’s episode, I briefly chat about my first experience with renovation. I didn’t choose this experience. It chose me. You can listen to the full story by clicking the link above. About five years ago, we had a major flood in our home. …